Thursday, 7 September 2017

30 things I've learned

Hi guys.

It's been a while and I feel like I just can't have a usual blogging tempo this year. A month ago I celebrated my 30th birthday. I think I was mentally preparing for it since last year or at least from New Year's. I felt awful about it. Anxious you know. And pressured... (over)thinking about all the things I'm not but socitey kind of expect when you reach that age. 

But. When it happened I felt kind of relief. My love and friends organize a lovely party and we just had a blast. I realize this is not so bad. We're healty and enjoying ourselves and in real, well-being and the right people in life are all you need.

Leveling up got me to think about 30 things I've managed to learned so far.

1. Don't explain yourself when you don't need to. Especially when you say 'no' to someone. You don't have to tell everything to everyone. So if you want a day off at work, have a day off not necessary telling what's the reason for it (if you don't want to tell it). You decide what to say and what not. Same if you are invited to a party or something else. I don't quite understand why most people try to explain it when they really don't have to.

2. It's ok to not be ok all the time. I believe that you attract what you put out in the world but being happy all the time is fake. Of course we all have bad days. Or even months. Or even longer periods. Forcing to look happy will not change what you feel on the inside.

3. The only competition you have is yourself. I'm not competitive by nature so sometimes for me it's hard to stay motivated but many people approach things by doing that. And quit after a while because they compare their level 1 with someone else's level 7.

4. Hydrate. Water is super important, obviously. Drink a lot of it. And if you get bored with it add some lemon or experiment with tea flavours.

5. Take action. You thing about how lovely it would be if only... Stop. Think again. Why haven't you done it yet? Is it a lack of will/money or you are afraid to do it? How could you make this possible? If you would like to try it - try it. Sometimes things happen by themselves but most of the time they don't. So make a plan and go fo it. If you don't try you'll never know.

6. Listen more than you speak (when people have something smart to say:P). Learn to listen what people are saying. But then again I know we all have at least that one person in our offices/familes who speaks way too much and thinks (s)he the center of the universe. That I recommend you to ignore (at least the half of it). I'm sad to say but I think people have stopped making conversations. That means talking and actually listening and asking questions. I feel everbody just want to talk about themselves all the time and what they think on every freaking topic.

7. Wear sunscreen every day. This is odd to many people here because we grow up wearing suncreen only for the time we're on a vacation but sun is still up and shining even if you're not on seaside. Having a UV protection when you're outdoors is importnat no matter the season. I'm sure if the skin could talk it would be thanking you.

8. Say hi, bye, thank you. Always. In a 'Zombieland' we're living it, a simple hi, look in the eyes and thank you goes a long way. Good manners and being nice are cool. Not only in real situations but also via email, texts, etc.

9. Enjoy the moment. You see a beautiful sunset and you immediately reach for the phone to take a picture of it. You take photos from different corners and later realize that pics are just not that beautiful as the sunset. So just enjoy the sunset. And drinks with your frineds. Or whatever you're doing. If you really need to, you can post it later. I know I (sometimes) do. But there are also times when I'm so fed up with social media I don't want to even know where my phone is. More and more I take a pic not for social media but for the memory of it.

10. Take time for yourself. Not only for your body but also your mind. We are caught up in a busy lives, our own routines but it's so important to take time off and have some alone time as well. If 10 minutes per day is all you have, take it. Exercise. Meditate. I see a huge difference in me if I don't take time for myself.

11. Ask for help. I was typical leo with too much pride but with years I realized asking for help is not a weakness. The ones that love you will be happy to help you. I know I am because it shows that the people can trust me.

12. Happiness starts with you. Sooner you realize that the better. We are all work in progress but it's true what they say. Happiness starts with you, not with your relationships, job, etc. This is also why no. 10 is so important. Be yourself.

13. Read more. You're probably thinking: ''But I'm super busy and I don't have time for it.'' Not true. Like with everything you have to make time for it. Reading is like runing. Of course you can't read a book in a day like you can't run a marathon on your first run. Try with 10 pages per day or 50 at weekends. You'll get better at it and want more. Books are simply awesome. Don't ever underestimate them. And don't think you need to be a bookworm. I'm not. For me success is if I read 6 books per year. But there were years I did't read any!

14. More experiences, less things. I use to buy so many things. Not expensive but way too much. I think month of travelling really gave me new perspective. I realized how little material things I actually needed. I was happy in the same clothes just discovering new places with a love of my life. Of course it's nice to buy yourself or get something nice but in real there is too much of everything nowadys. It's kind of crazy how we are slaves to material things and are so ignorant about it.

15. Live your life YOUR way. Sometimes this is really hard but nobody is living your life but you. For me it's hard to fit in society standards but for the most parts I love my reality. And I love people who make me feel I'm not a feak just because I don't want kids and typical stuff that is almost expected from me. I need to do what I feel it's best for me.

16. Let it be. Most of us have at least one situation from the past that is not cleared (family stuff, ex partner or frineds). Don't ovethink it. It was what it was. I guess this is one of the hardest thing but living in the past really doesn't do us any favors.

17. Priorities. I had enough drama growing us so I avoid it as much as I can. I don't care about work gossip, unnecessary chit chat, misleading media fuss, etc. I focus my energy on the things I love: my family and friends, movies and tv series, exercising, reading, exploring, etc. Life is never boring if you know what is important and interesting to you. And no, that's not checking social media feeds.

18. Life is not perfect. I was perfectionist and idealist (and in some ways I still am) so realizing that was hard. But no relationship, family or job or even a pet is perfect. When you face with that, life gets kind of easier. We are all humans, make mistakes and there is no shame in that. You can still be awesome nice human being. I think many times we have this picture perfect images on how life should be. Idealizing having a family/partner/friends/kids/job/traveling. Everything really. Usually things are far more messy. That's life.

19. Trends don't matter. I mean of course they matter to capitalism but you don't have to consider them just because others do. I refer to all sorts of trends - from fashion, music, tv and lifestyle. Don't get me wrong. If I really like something I am as bad as any. Like flamingos everywhere this year for me but I don't watch reality shows just because most people do and my face can turn red with anger when I hear so called music nowadys. It's just noise. When it comes to fashion I appreciate individual's style way more than 'on trend' people. Of course they buy trends too but apply it to their style.

20. Discover new places. Travel as much as you can. Unique experiences will broaden your mind. And you don't have to travel to the end of the world. You can explore places nearby. If I could I would love to travel more. There are many places on my wishlist. However it's also tricky because of all the negative things going on in the world and I feel that many places lost their magic since everybody (Tripadvisor, Lonely planet, Bloggers, Instagramers, Influencers) are writing the same things. And than you visit the place and it's way too crowded and popular. I have this image how cool it was to travel back in the day when places were not that commercialized. You see. Idealizing :)

21. Have confidence. Uh. I have a long way to go when it comes to being confident but I'm better than 10 years ago for sure. Some poeple have this natural confidence (not arrogance or cockiness) I definitely wish I had. But some people scare me on how confident they are but only talk BS. So yes, try to believe in yourself.

22. Don't wait for the 'right time'. Sometimes I feel I've waited for some things way too long. Of course other things makes sense and I know why I'm waiting. But it's not good to make a habit of it. Like I've said. If you really want it do something about it or start planning. Life is happening now! Years go by so quickly. But also don't feel discouraged. I a year (or even in a few months) you can change your life completely. Also. Don't waist time on the wrong people.

23. Never forget the little things. A text to loved ones that you're thinking of them, a welcome back sticky note for your colleague. Little acts of kindness are the biggest.

24. Gratitude. Don't take people, things, life you have for granted. 

25. Success has a different face. How do you imagine a successful person? In a nutshell - I use to imagine this suit up guy with a briefcase who drives a fancy Lexus and it's super busy with meetings all day. Now successful people in my eyes are the ones who actually live and enjoy life. The ones that find a way to turn their passion into bussiness. They have their own ideas and life tempo.

26. Stop caring about what other people think or say about you. Why does it even matter? If people have problems with themselves, they will judge you no matter what you say or do. Don't lose yourself in the process of approval. You can' please everyone and that is okay.

27. Set goals but don't forget to enjoy the ride. Having plans and goals is excellent, just don't get caught up. You should also have a good time on the road to achieving your dreams.

28. Change is the only constant. If we like it or not. Life goes on even when it would be good to stop it for a while.

29. A nice meal, a good sleep and sincere laugh are priceless. Every single time. Especailly in a good company.

30. Don't give up. Ever. If  you never quit, you'll never fail. We all have ups and downs and it's hard to strat again and again but you have to. For you. 

Now I'll try to level up my discoveries and I still need to improve on many things like being more patient :) Hopefully you enjoy reading this.

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